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Blueberries and Delays
Luce Smith, Features Writer
Blueberries photo by Tom Ipri
It's a busy one, but I squeeze in and manage to get a seat. I'm not sure if I regret it though, as the girl in front is sat next to her friend, and she has lots to say. Now don't get me wrong, I can talk a lot, but if I am ever heard talking such, well, I don't even know how to describe it, but if I ever sound like her, please put me down.

Nonstop from departure to arrival, were the words coming out of her mouth. I don't actually think her friend said a word, he actually could have been asleep, as she didn't require any feedback or responses from what she was saying. If she did, she gave it from her own perspective. Which is a bit cheeky really, and totally biased, but no doubt she would give reasons for this approach.

Also by Luce Smith...
The Luce Smith Holme Moss Challenge
Tour De Bicycles And A Fox
New Words, New Skills
Diversion
Time Flies
She was going to put some slap on when they got there, not too much as she didn't want to look like a slag, but felt now she is supervising, she ought to. She knows why the sink doesn't work too, so is going to close that area for ten minutes whilst she puts 'this stuff down', then hopefully it will clear. "Rachel doesn't really know what she's doing, but it's ok, as Steve knows now so he won't let her get away with it. Nick thinks he is moving up to be supervisor this year but everyone knows he won't be 'cos of what happened last year. I hope I get some good staff this time or else I may not come back next year. It's ok though as I was looking at working in London instead anyway...." Oh yes, please do, Londoners will love to hear you as much as I do.........

Blueberries. They're not blue. Or even close to blue. I've only just discovered this from smashing one with the back of my spoon. Is it common knowledge? Does everybody know that blueberries are actually greenberries in disguise? Would people be so keen to promote them if they had a name that was true in terms of the trading act? Porridge topped with greenberries....yum. Enjoy a greenberry and yogurt smoothie? Try snacking on some greenberries covered in a blue coat......that's what they are! Greenberries covered in blue skin.

So how did they get their name changed? Oranges are oranges through and through. What you see us what you get. But blueberries, well, they're just teasing you! I feel I should stand in a supermarket, peel lots of blueberries and ask customers to try this new berry, which hasn't got a skin, so it's naked I guess....nakedberry with porridge anyone?

I have not got time for this, somebody send a drone to pick me up and airlift me to where I need to be. I know I totally exceed the weight limit, but I'm desperate. I have to get somewhere super quick, and what happens?

This......

I arrive at the station, and see that my train is delayed. So I opt for a different train, to find that that's not stopping at my stop for some reason. Fine, I'll go on the other train, which stops a few more times but reaches my station. I look at the departure board and head off with my speed walk. I make the train and text the person I'm meeting to say I'll be 13minutes.

Only I'm not going to be 13 minutes as the driver from my original train which was delayed, is due to drive this train, so we're now delayed. I want to scream, and I get very anxious. It's a hot, rush hour train, and I'm beginning to lose my patience. I think of other faster routes, but come up with nothing. I must look like a crazy woman as I'm rolling my eyes, tutting, checking my watch every millisecond and I'm very fidgety! If you saw someone with that description, I'm glad you kept quiet, as I was in no mood for conversation.

The driver made it over the platform, and we finally got powered up and moving. But only just out of the station, when we stopped for some good few minutes, and where I was able to take up my eye rolling, tutting and checking my watch every other second. Why? Why does this always happen when you're needed elsewhere? It's a good job 'that' girl wasn't on this commute as I may have had to put her scarf over her head. Which would no doubt have ended up with me being removed from the train by the men in white coats..... Such fun ;)
Blueberries and Delays, 25th May 2016, 10:21 AM