“If that’s glamping,” said my pal John, “then I’m leaving our house, down-sizing and moving in with you!”

It was not difficult to understand his point considering that I was, at that moment, simmering in an outside jacuzzi at the Longnor Wood Holiday Hideaway near Buxton in Derbyshire.

I’d just sent him a few ‘couldn’t believe my eyes’ What’sApp photos, and while he was still articulating his jealousy, my wife popped her head round the door of our Chatsworth Superior Lodge – complete with bedroom, en-suite and open plan living area - handed me a towel dressing gown and announced that tea would be ready in five minutes.

In customary Filipino fashion, my better half had brought enough food to feed an army and had spent hours pre-preparing spaghetti bolognaise and chicken adobo – a favourite in the Philippines – in the mistaken belief that, at best, we would have a microwave to heat everything up; how wrong we were.

Instead Longnor’s fully equipped lodge ‘house’ was several notches better than our own abode in the depleted urban splendour of Leeds, leaving us with the ultimate dichotomy: should we move here permanently or not!

In the early days the word ‘glamping’ was a euphemism for glamorous camping: at best an up-market tent or, more recently, a shepherd’s ‘pod’ or ‘hut’ but, with one upmanship now raging at many of Britain’s competing campsites, the stakes have been raised!

“I think we should call at the Blue John Cavern en-route to Longnor,” I had declared to my wife the night before.

As a former native of Manila, she had no clue what I was talking about and, having missed the annual trip to one of Derbyshire’s top attractions whilst still at primary school, I was determined to call in at Castleton and pay homage to this fascinating place, home to eight of the 14 known varieties of Blue-John Stone, a beautiful and ornamental fluor-spar.

Nigel Bradbury, right. A font of information!

The amazing Blue John Cavern

Mam Tor in Derbyshire is the only place in the world it is mined and, as we arrived, we were greeted by the wonderfully quirky, self-confessed Northern Lights ‘chaser’, Nigel Bradbury, our guide for the one-hour underground tour.

His unswerving knowledge of the caves, first discovered in 1705, was crammed into an unbroken 60-minute monologue interspersed with humour and anecdotes, which left us in little doubt as to why the attraction, owned by the Ollerenshaw family for decades, is still a firm favourite among visitors to the Peak District.

The Blue-John Cavern is steeped in history and old mining equipment is still on view inside the cave network where guided tours run throughout the day.

Outside the weather raged and, as we continued our journey to Longnor Wood Holiday Park, which boasts its own take on glamping pods, holiday homes and lodges, it soon became apparent why it was also referred to as a Holiday Hideaway.
As far as Britain can ever be considered ‘remote’, Longnor, in the great scheme of things is!

Read here: lovely and quiet, adults only, sweeping views all around and 20+ miles from the likes of Bakewell – home to the famous pudding shop – Matlock Bath, the weekend motorbike mecca, the Crich Tramway Village and lots of other interesting things.

So, on the one hand, Longnor Wood will leave you well rested and feeling relatively remote, with just trees and fields for company whilst, on the other, not too far from the nearby village of Longnor with its café, pub and picturesque church or, indeed, fascinating other places.

“We’d better get off,” I said next morning, “or we’ll look like a couple of shrivelled prunes if we sit in this jacuzzi much longer,” I said to Mrs H

The temptation to relax was overwhelming but, after a giant effort, we got dressed, finished breakfast and headed off to the village of Cromford to seek out Arkwright’s famous mill.

Cromford Mills, part of the Derwent Valley World Heritage Site, were built by self-made man, Sir Richard Arkwright in 1771, and changed the world for ever when the former wig maker perfected the world’s first water-powered cotton spinning machine, and gave birth to the industrial revolution by ushering in a new era of mass production.

He had left this world by 1792 at the relatively young age of 60 but, when he died, had amassed shares in 110 of the country’s 143 cotton-spinning mills earning accolades from the then Prime Minister, William Pitt the Younger, who commented that Arkwright was one of the country’s great heroes and needed to be spoken about in the same breath as Wellington or Nelson.

It is a sobering visit and one in which you can still tangibly observe greatness at work in the form of a huge water wheel, whilst witnessing the genius of Crompton’s Spinning Mule and other amazing inventions.

Nearly two hundred years later Roy Jacuzzi would invent the first integrated whirlpool bath, or Jacuzzi in 1968. Two hours later, we would be back in the tub at our Chatsworth Superior Lodge, linen and towels provided at no extra cost!

There are some excellent facilities at the site, which boasts a games room with darts and pool, and a sauna you can hire by the 30-minute slot for just £5.

However, there is little reason to leave your lodge which comes with its own private furnished decking, well-equipped modern kitchen, an enormous king-sized bed, luxurious bathroom with rainfall shower and free-standing Victorian-style bath, and private parking for one vehicle.
Had we had a dog that too would have been fine although that incurs an additional cleaning charge (make sure you book one of the dog friendly lodges).

At £545 to £725 for three nights, depending on whether it is low or high season, I have to say it is worth every penny if you consider the relaxation value of such a stay, which enables you to unwind from the trials and tribulations of daily life with its stresses, strains and self-imposed wind-ups!

Other than a closure period between 10th January and 1st March, Longnor is available year round including over Christmas and New Year and, by booking direct, you avoid any add-on charges or additional fees should you need to change your holiday dates.
“I don’t think it even existed when I was working for Ram FM in Derby’s Assembly Rooms,” I explained to Mrs H, “so it is probably a recent manifestation,” I added.

I was referring to the Great British Car Journey at Ambergate which only opened in 2021 and is now a must for any petrol head visiting Derbyshire!

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Even better, when the founder and CEO, Richard Usher, offered to give us a personal guided tour it rapidly became a highlight of the weekend.

Presenting us with one of the attraction’s brochures, this self-confessed car nut and creator of Blyton Park Race Track in Lincolnshire declared, like a naughty schoolboy: “I don’t include all the stories about our numerous cars in literature because I don’t want them leaving the building!”

And it was those very stories that made the place: one of Elton John’s former cars, a Scimitar once owned by Princess Anne, the Rolls Royce that Britain’s scouts bought for Lord Baden Powell in celebration of his wedding.

All fantastic tales. Usher, the man of the moment, had the two of us hooked and, without doubt, this is an exhibition that you will visit again and again if you have a penchant for British cars.
It had been a weekend of contrasts. We had enjoyed the isolated splendour of Longnor Wood Caravan Park as wind and rain raged outside our lodge and yet, 10-20 miles away in any direction there were some wonderful attractions.

In 1986 I had been one of the first on-air newsreaders at RAM FM when it first opened in Derby’s Assembly Rooms and declared to the world ‘we are on air and live’.

In a blink it was 36 years later, maybe I was marginally wiser, who knows? However, it had been a nostalgic weekend and wonderful to see how my fondness for Derbyshire hadn’t been diminished by time, moreover, it had grown and, despite my looming state pension, I genuinely appreciated what this wonderful county had to offer a man entering his twilight years, with all its fascinating facts and boys toys!

And, where better than to rest my head for three nights than in my Longnor Wood Holiday Hideaway?

FAST FACTS
Longnor Wood Holiday Park - www.longnorwood.co.uk
Tel: 01298 83648
Our Chatsworth Lodge
Luxury 1-bedroom Lodge with hot tub. Max 2 adult
3-night stay
Low Season £545 to £725 High Season

ATTRACTIONS
Blue-John Cavern
www.bluejohn-cavern.co.uk
Tel: 01433 620638
Cromford Mills
www.cromfordmills.org.uk
Tel: 01629 823256
The Great British Car Journey
www.greatbritishcarjourney.com
Tel: 01773 317243